About this episode
How can we help ourselves be interested—and ready—for sex?
- What are some of the challenges women face when it comes to getting in the mood?
- What does the bible have to say about getting ready for sex?
- What are some things we can actually do to help ourselves look forward to sex?
Listen to the episode
From the Bible
What does God have to say about getting in the mood? One biblical wife we know well is the woman in the Song of Solomon. One thing she does is describe–in detail–the physical attributes of her husband.
My lover is dark and dazzling, better than ten thousand others!
His head is finest gold, his wavy hair is black as a raven.
His eyes sparkle like doves beside springs of water;
they are set like jewels washed in milk.
His cheeks are like gardens of spices giving off fragrance.
His lips are like lilies, perfumed with myrrh.
His arms are like rounded bars of gold, set with beryl.
His body is like bright ivory, glowing with lapis lazuli.
His legs are like marble pillars set in sockets of finest gold.
His posture is stately, like the noble cedars of Lebanon.
His mouth is sweetness itself; he is desirable in every way.
Such, O women of Jerusalem, is my lover, my friend.
Song of Solomon 5:10-16 {NLT}
Resources
Calm.Healthy.Sexy: 5 Ways to Feel Sexier This Year
The Forgiven Wife: 6 Ways to Nurture Your Sexual Desire
The Forgiven Wife: Are You in the Mood for Sex?
OysterBed 7: 1 Simple Thing to Turn on Sexual Arousal and Intensify Orgasm
What’s always worked for me is just stopping, everything. First, I get a cup of coffee or tea, hot or iced. Second, I grab a book or an article on the tablet. Third, I relax, let the day melt away, turn my mind to sweet memories and Presto! Fourth, I am looking for my husband! You see, I don’t have a low libido. I have a shy, hidden libido! I must relax before it shows itself. It took a few years for me to fully understand that being a mother did not help me as a wife. That is when I began working out my relaxation plan. And my husband is so happy I did! Just having a wife who is in the moment with him makes so much difference.
Your plan to coax a shy libido into the open is so do-able! No exotic game plan, just find a few quiet moments. Thank you for sharing your relaxation technique for other wives to consider.
I wish I had found these resources twenty years ago! It’s especially encouraging to me to hear from the gal with low libido, as that’s my situation. I’m definitely going to encourage my daughters and sons to use these Christian sex resources when they get married!
I used to have my “big clean” shower first thing in the morning, and by the end of the day spent homeschooling our 4 blessings, I could only squeeze in brushing my teeth and collapsing into bed like a log. Now, I switched the “big clean” to the evening after our 4 children are in bed, a shower, teeth brushed and flossed, skin cleansed etc. As I do these, I imagine myself washing Mom off and unleashing the Wife. I rub on lotion and as I do all this, I tell myself that when my husband gets near me, he’s gonna be glad that I am clean and smell sweet and I am in the mood. Works everytime. Now when my husband hears the shower running upstairs, he smiles because he knows that it is important to me.
Excellent symbolism of washing of mom and unleashing the sensual wife. Thank you for sharing your story.
I love this idea. I’m going to try it. Thank you for sharing it!